A Great Loss

It is with an extreme amount of sadness that I write today about the death of an incredible woman, friend, and Doctor. Dr. Shannon Moorehead, my OB/Gyn of 9 years, left this world unexpectedly March 8, 2012. I met her in 2003 when I was pregnant with my first born. At the time I was 22 and she was 31. We bonded instantly. She had just returned from maternity leave after having her first son, Joshua. As time progressed I found out I would have to have a C Section since James was breech. I found so much comfort having her as my doctor since she had a C Section as well. She was able to give me perspective on how my delivery day would go both as a mother and as a doctor. She answered all of my questions. She was very matter of fact, for her intelligence was amazing. But she also understood not everything was black and white and there was some gray. She would tell me that too. Good doctors are hard to find, but Dr Moorehead was one of the best. On my delivery day, I was sitting naked in only my hospital gown, on the operating table while the anesthesiologist gave me my spinal tap. Shannon held my hands and to take away my fears she distracted me and told me she was expecting her second child, Ethan. I was elated for her and the rest of my C Section progressed with ease. I had a few visits with her before I came in to hear Jacob was on his way. VBAC or repeat C section was my biggest debate this pregnancy. She told me she would do whatever I wanted, but I would deliver at St Joe's downtown where they have the equipment if anything goes wrong. That and the fact she had a repeat c section herself for Ethan was enough to convince me I should do the same. I suffered a lot of postpartum after Jacob was born. She helped me through it more than anyone ever has, especially since I'd been dealing with depression most of my adult life. During that time we talked about future babies. A third child was out of the question for her, but I was always on the fence. She gave me statistics about third C Sections and shared with me everything I needed to know to help make a wise decision where myself and baby was concerned.

We had decided to move forward with baby #3 when I had a miscarriage. She explained to me that it was called a chemical pregnancy. That it was very early on and if I did not know my body so well that I probably would have thought it was a heavy period. Most people don't even know they are pregnant or that they are having a miscarriage at all. She explained that they don't know why it happens. That there was something that just did not take and most importantly, she helped me understand that it was not my fault.

The months to follow I struggled to get pregnant again. She was encouraging and let me know it just takes time for my body to sort things out but it will happen.

As always I trusted she was right and when I came in to get tested for the pregnancy of Jaely, she secretly told me behind those closed doors she was pregnant too! And only a few weeks further along than me. Of course I freaked out and selfishly demanded that she be there to deliver my baby no matter what! She agreed, but also told me her coworker does an even better C Section than she does. But she did show up, even on maternity leave. Jaely even came two weeks early, on a Sunday and she showed up to deliver her for me.

Josh always says she has the best bedside manner of any doctor. She was always so calm and collected. Nothing ever seemed to shake her nerves. You could ask her anything and everything. Nothing was out of the question. I even joked after struggling to lose weight that she left a sponge in me. She giggle but in her matter of fact tone let me know that that did not happen. My appointments, even yearly check ups were more like a lunch date with friends not an appointment at all. We would spend that time playing catch up on each others lives. In fact as big of a hassle as it was, I brought the kids in occasionally to my appointments because I knew how much she wanted to see them. We discussed baby names, I already had a Jacob and she wanted a Jake, but her sister already had a Jake so Jacob it was. I explained how I always liked Jake more, but wanted my boy to have a full name and after he was born I liked the name Jacob more than Jake. She agreed she would probably feel the same way soon.

She listened to my problems and concerns. Now that she has passed I realize all of her patients were as special to her as I was. She had a unique relationship with each and every one of them. She remembered the names of the thousands of children she delivered. I'm sad I missed her funeral service but I heard the number of people that attended was unbelievable. I can only imagine. If I had known I would have been there too!

I wish she knew how important she was to each of us and how grateful we were to have her in our lives. I wish I had actually gone to get my check up when they sent me the postcard so I could have seen her one last time. I wish I would have returned their call when they attempted to notify me of her death. So many regrets, but as patients and friends we must know we could not have changed what happened.

Shannon, thank you for being you. For all of your support, love, and care. For all the lives you saved, and the babies you delivered. You were special and we miss you. I know you are sitting with God in heaven.